FOR generations, a toxic statement has echoed in our society: ‘Women work less than men.’ This belief has shaped gender roles, justified unequal treatment, and diminished the value of women’s daily labour. But when we look closely, the myth does not stand the test of reality.
Women, particularly mothers, carry out endless unpaid and undervalued tasks that fuel our families and societies. From dawn to midnight, a woman’s day is stitched together with small but relentless pieces of labour — cooking, cleaning, caregiving, managing households, attending to the emotional needs of family members, and often, juggling professional work on top of it. Yet, ironically, the world often perceives these efforts as ‘less’ than the work men do outside the home.
The truth is much deeper. While men may possess greater muscle mass due to biological factors, women often engage in equal or greater overall energy expenditure when household and caregiving work is counted. What makes the issue more alarming is the way women’s nutritional needs — particularly protein intake — are overlooked, despite the fact that they are already physiologically disadvantaged in muscle strength.
This is not just a story of food distribution at the dinner table; it is a reflection of how societies undervalue women’s existence. The consequences are grave: early joint pain, backaches, chronic fatigue, osteoporosis, and even premature ageing. And at the heart of this health crisis is one undeniable fact: if mothers do not eat well, families cannot truly thrive.
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Science of muscle mass
LET us begin with biology. On average, adult women carry 15–16 kg of muscle mass within a body weighing 50–60 kg. Men, in contrast, not only weigh more on average but also possess higher percentages of lean body mass — meaning more muscle tissue to support strength and endurance. This difference begins in adolescence when boys tend to be more physically active and encouraged to play sports, climb trees, or engage in outdoor games. Their muscles grow stronger through both biology and environment.
Girls, on the other hand, often face restrictions during the same period of life. Social expectations push them indoors, discouraging vigorous physical activity. Consequently, women enter adulthood with comparatively less muscle mass and often weaker bones. Add to this the hormonal shifts of menstruation, pregnancy, and menopause — all of which place additional demands on the female body.
This biological gap is not destiny. With adequate nutrition, exercise, and societal support, women can build and sustain strength. Unfortunately, culture often widens this gap instead of bridging it.
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Invisible labour of women
WHEN men return home after a day’s work, they are often seen as ‘breadwinners’. Women, however, remain invisible labourers. The cooking, cleaning, laundry, child-rearing, and elder care they provide are rarely counted in GDP or recognised as productive economic activity. Yet, countless studies estimate that if unpaid household labour were monetised, it would contribute 10–39 per cent of a country’s GDP depending on the nation.
In Bangladesh, surveys show that women spend six to eight hours daily on unpaid household work, compared to one or two hours for men. This does not even include emotional labour — caring for children’s education, monitoring family health, managing social relations, and ensuring household harmony.
These activities may not look like ‘hard labour’ in the traditional sense, but the constant bending, lifting, walking, standing, and multitasking add up. Unlike men, who may exert themselves intensely in one stretch at work, women’s labour is dispersed throughout the day, leaving little opportunity for rest or recovery.
And yet, when dinner is served, the one who laboured most is often the last to eat — and the least to get the nutrition she deserves.
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Mother’s plate: a tale of inequality
EVERY Bengali household tells a story at mealtime. When chicken curry is served, the prized pieces — the tender leg, the juicy breast — are placed on the plates of fathers and sons. Mothers, grandmothers, and aunts are left with scraps: the skin, the head, the neck, and the liver. This is not generosity; it is sacrifice forced by culture.
From childhood, girls are taught that serving others first is a mark of virtue. They grow into women who instinctively ensure that husbands and children eat well, even if it means leaving themselves with leftovers. Over time, this pattern becomes entrenched, and women consistently eat less protein and fewer micronutrients than they require.
Protein is not a luxury; it is a necessity. It fuels muscle repair, supports immunity, and maintains metabolic health. For women, whose muscle reserves are already lower than men’s, skipping protein is particularly damaging. Without enough of it, the body begins to lose muscle mass faster, leading to weakness, fatigue, and frailty.
What we call ‘a mother’s sacrifice’ is, in reality, a systemic deprivation that compromises her health and shortens her vitality.
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Hidden costs: early aging and chronic pain
VISIT any rural or urban household, and you will hear the same complaints from middle-aged women: ‘My knees hurt.’ ‘I strained my back.’ ‘My body just can’t take it anymore.’ These are not just isolated health issues; they are the cumulative results of years of malnutrition and overwork. Women in South Asia, including Bangladesh, show higher rates of osteoporosis, anaemia, and arthritis compared to men of the same age. Research also suggests that women in many developing countries appear to age faster due to nutritional neglect and reproductive health burdens.
The tragedy is not only physical. Early physical decline limits women’s ability to enjoy life, pursue hobbies, or remain economically active. It also places additional pressure on families, who must care for an ailing mother or grandmother — the same woman who once cared for everyone else.
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Why women’s health is family health
THE health of women, especially mothers, is inseparable from the health of families. Malnourished mothers give birth to underweight children, perpetuating cycles of poor health. A mother with chronic fatigue cannot optimally support her children’s education or development. A mother with osteoporosis may suffer fractures that not only bring personal pain but also destabilise the entire household.
Conversely, when women are well-fed and strong, entire families benefit. Children grow up seeing a role model of self-care and strength. Husbands enjoy the companionship of a healthy partner. Communities thrive when women can contribute not just labour but leadership.
It is not an exaggeration: investing in women’s nutrition is investing in the future of society.
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Way forward: rethinking nutrition and gender roles
HOW do we dismantle this injustice? We need family-level change. Serve mothers first at the table, not last. Normalise giving women the same quality of protein — meat, fish, eggs, dairy — as men and children. Encourage shared household labour so women are not overburdened. There is a need for community-wide awareness. Campaigns must emphasise that unpaid household work is real work. Local health workers and NGOs should teach families about protein needs for women, particularly during pregnancy, lactation, and midlife.
Government nutrition programmes must specifically target women, ensuring protein-rich foods are accessible. Workplaces should support maternal health with nutrition and wellness programmes. Statistical agencies should measure and value unpaid labour in national accounts.
Media should portray strong, healthy women as aspirational, not women who silently sacrifice. Religious and social leaders must advocate for fairness in family nutrition.
The image of the mother eating chicken skin while the best pieces go to others is not an anecdote; it is a metaphor for centuries of inequality. It is time we ask: At what cost do we celebrate this sacrifice?
A woman who does not nourish herself cannot remain the pillar of the family forever. Her weakened body and depleted energy eventually become a burden, not a blessing. The love and care she offers deserve to be matched by respect and recognition — and that begins with the plate in front of her.
Women may have less muscle mass than men, but they shoulder more than their share of labour. They deserve nutrition, not as charity, but as justice. If we want healthier families, stronger communities, and a brighter nation, we must start by serving mothers better — not just in words, but in food, in health, and in dignity.
Because when mothers thrive, the whole world thrives.
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Raisa Mehzabeen is the founder and CEO of Nutrition For Change.
